Let it Be

So I'm learning that, despite my best efforts, I have absolutely not mastered the art of 'letting it be'. Doh. I have always viewed myself as patient, fairly level-headed, and tolerant of people and things. It turns out that's only really applicable to people who aren't me, and things that aren't my shit or in... Continue Reading →

My Body is a Crime Scene

Some days are really good! I don't sit thinking about memories, or being consumed by PTSD, or worrying about body image, or the ways in which I've fucked up X, Y or Z. Some days the fog isn't there and I can go about life fairly easily, with just a subtle undertone of my 'issues'.... Continue Reading →

And Now, I Go. 

Today is one of those darker days. I'm triggered and disgustingly sick and feel deflated even though I know this feeling will pass. New memories surfaced yesterday. They still hit me like a train every time. It's been a while so I fell pretty hard. The breathlessness. The panic. The pain. I spent five or... Continue Reading →

Dear Me.

Dear little one, it's a shame that you look in the mirror and all you can see are flaws, as though the body you were born into is wrong for not living up to standards of beauty. But remember, your reflection does not define who you are; a beautiful soul, though perhaps not visible, will... Continue Reading →

Shame is a Shame

Sometimes I get homework. Sometimes I avoid the crap out of homework because I know it will make me feel, and feelings are bad because they make you pay attention to the truth. I know, 'the truth will set you free', blah, blah. But, in my experience, the truth will actually tackle you to the... Continue Reading →

The Phoenix Rising… Sort of.

So... I guess this is blogging. Holy Fuck. If you've ever seen Brené Brown's Ted Talks on 'The Power of Vulnerability' and 'Listening to Shame",  you will be extremely familiar with the phrase "vulnerability hangover". That is my current reality. Ugh. (If you haven't seen the Ted Talks, go and watch them, NOW). My head... Continue Reading →

“Every Journey Begins with a Single Step”

Sometimes I wonder how I ended up here. I contemplate the ‘what ifs’ or whether my life would be different had I known what I know now ten years ago. The answer? ‘Probably’. This is a bitter pill to swallow, particularly if you have learned to become as self-reliant, stubborn and independent as I. There’s […]

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